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Signs You’re in a Toxic Relationship

When we are so heavily invested in a relationship, it can often be hard to determine whether or not the relationship is healthy. We’ve composed a guide of the most common giveaway signs your relationship is in fact toxic and what to do to turn the situation around, if you want to salvage things instead of running for the hills.

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Toxic behavior that causes relationships to fail


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Passive aggressiveness

Do you find yourself bottling things up or do you sense that your partner is in fact doing exactly the same thing? Passive aggression and mean spirited remarks are unhealthy and uncalled for in any situation, especially in a relationship. If you feel uncomfortable expressing yourself and being direct with your partner, you need to consider that your relationship may be unhealthy.

Actions to take:

Try being open and honest with each other, don’t be afraid to say what’s on your mind, keeping things to yourself will only make you miserable and resentful towards your other half.

Jealousy

The green eyed monster naturally rears his head in most relationships, but this shouldn’t happen too often. Being overly jealous indicates that there is a lack of trust between you and your partner. Trust is the base of any good relationship and without you simply can’t be happen and won’t have any peace of mind.

Actions to take:

Do some self-reflection and take some time to analyze you relationship, are there any red flags which explain why you have trouble trusting your partner? If so, address them quickly and talk them through with your other half.

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Not being yourself

People evolve over time and change is inevitable, but if you feel as if you are losing yourself and are unable to remember who you are, this is a sign that your relationship isn’t working. Relationships are there to make us better versions of our present selves, not to totally disconnect us from who we are.

Actions to take:

Take some time out for yourself, get in contact with some old friends and hit the town, or alternatively spend some quality time with your family and you sense of identity will come back in no time.

Looking backwards

Do you find your reminiscing about the early phases of your relationship? Do you miss them? These act as telltale signs that your relationship is unhealthy. Relationships do evolve but unfortunately they sometimes evolve for the worst.

Actions to take:

Think about what is now missing from your relationship and what was present at the beginning, are there any changes you can make to get the old spark back?

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You’re unhappy

Happiness is undeniably one of the most important things in a relationship. Arguments and disagreements are normal in any relationship, but this doesn’t mean that you should be unhappy as a result of them. Your partner is supposed to make you happy not sad.

Actions to take:

If you have the possibility, try to organize some alone time with your other half, maybe plan a weekend break in an effort to reconnect. 

You are more invested

You are constantly doing things for them and don’t always feel you get much in return; it may be the cooking, organising of plans or meeting of each other’s family. If one of you is doing much more than the other there should be warning bells ringing.

Actions to take: 

Communicate with your partner and let them know how you feel and that your relationship requires equal efforts from both parties in order to progress further.

Lack of commitment

Your partner never commits to future plans with you and it often feels that they only spend time with you when they have nothing better to do. But do they every commit to spending time with you in advance? Do they show their excitement to do something with the person they love? If not maybe it’s time to re-think your relationship!

Actions to take:

Take a step back from your relationship and let your partner realize just how much they miss you.

Lack of trust

Does your partner have odd cellphone habits? Perhaps they don’t reply to your messages and calls? ‘He’s just bad with his phone’ you hear yourself telling your friends as you explain why you haven’t been in contact for 3 days… If they want to talk to you they will, it’s as simple as that.

Actions to take:

Find something that works for you both, it doesn't have to be anything too complicated, why not just remove the passcode from your phones and laptops? You'll both be way less paranoid.

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